Now if anyone has seen Khloe Kardashians Revenge Body on E! you'll have seen people want revenge on their partners, their ex's, their mothers and fathers and even friends. I started this journey June 2016 and I had people like Khloe Kardashian to look to among others as inspiration, she was the bigger sister, she seemed to have settled with that fact until a major event happened and she wanted to make a great change for herself.
Now I don't care what your opinions are on the Kardashians but the only one I 'keep up on' is Khloe, I watch her workouts on Snapchat and she kills it every workout, she inspires people and she inspires me. Simple!
You see I was the bigger sister, if you want a mental picture of what me and my sister looks like just look at Kourtney and Khloe standing next to each other. I was always putting myself down because I wasn't like her, I hated that I couldn't wear the small, cute, petite clothes she could, I hated that at 14 I was wearing big mummy bras with a 3 inch straps and she was wearing little bras with a half a centimetre strap. I didn't hate her, I hated myself. I was big, I was fat and I wasn't going to be anything else, and it always bothered me. I don't think it was until I went to college that I started to accept that this was my body, it wasn't going to change so I had to accept it. I then got in my first relationship ever with Nick and I got myself happy (yayay) and I got 2 stone heavier, I didn't mind though because I was active enough that it wasn't a problem and I'm 5 8" so it was spread around evenly.
I got pregnant in 2013 and it was amazing, we couldn't wait to expand our family by one, but in 9 months my weight gained by 6 stone, although I was happy in my relationship, my home and where I was in my life, I wasn't happy with who I was and what I looked like but guess what I did, something I've been doing for years, I accepted that I was big, this was me now so what if I was miserable and depressed nothing was going to change. In Mia's first year I had naturally lost 2 stone in weight which I never took notice off because I was too busy being a mum. It was on Mia's 1st birthday that we announced we were pregnant again. Again we were overjoyed that our family was again expanding and Mia was going to have a little baby sister.
During that pregnancy I gained a stone and a half which never bothered me, was I still annoyed I was big? Yes. But there was nothing I could do, because I was big, this was who I was, I was constantly taunting myself, bullying myself just because I was big and I'd settled with that fact. But something happened about a month after Robyn was born. I snapped it was June 2016 and it was like that part in my head that was always saying,
"You're fat, you're always going to be fat, this is who you are,"
That part in my mind finally pushed it's last button and the accepting, timid, beaten and weak side of me flipped. I began telling myself,
"I wasn't fat, far was something I had, I wasn't always going to be fat because I was going to eat healthier and workout regularly, and this wasn't who I was going to be."
That's when my weightloss journey began just to prove what I was telling myself, I had enough of being just big, I deserved to get my body to a point where I'm happy to accept it, not accepting it just because I'd never tried to change. I kept telling myself I couldn't, but I could and I can do anything I wanted, and that's what I'm doing, so you could say my revenge is on me, it's to that part of me that never let me be happy, my revenge will be on myself for letting myself believe I didn't deserve to be happy in my own skin.
I'm so close to my 4 stone weightloss mark and I'm feeling so strong, my muscle gain feels amazing and now I don't feel the remaining fat on my body that I know is there, all I feel it muscle and half the time they're sore. it's like that fat I have left really isn't a part of me anymore and it's fitting because the words me and fat are no longer associated with each other any more.
So I would like to list a few things that I have learned on this journey:
Now I'm writing this as the most impatient person ever, so a lot of will power and determination is thrown in there also. It doesn't get easier but you get stronger and the progress and the results you start to see make it all worth it.
Find People Who Have Been On The Same Journey
On Instagram there are hundreds, literally hundreds of people on there who started their journey just like I did and all they did was eat healthy and exercise, fill your brain with real success stories. Get your motivation from real people, not photoshopped celebs in magazines.
Ditch Celebrity Workout Plans
They are SHITE, they just want your money.
Learn To Love YouTube For It's Workouts
Who knew watching youtube could make me sweaty and out of breathe, YES. There are tonnes of workout videos on youtube you can follow in the comfort of your own home. I LOVE them, they are what I do, and I wouldn't want to do any other workouts.
Learn About Your Food
Seriously I can not stress this enough. don't take notice of newspapers when they tell you coconut oil can give you cancer when there is proven research that tells you it prevents it among other life threatening illnesses. Do your research people, learn about what foods are good and what they do for your body.
Believe In Yourself
Because anything is possible, 'possible' it self is in the word 'impossible' anyways, it's really a self contradicting word. but seriously if you believe you can do it and stick to an easy plan with realistic goals you can do it, why? I may hear you ask, well I'm doing it!
Peace and Love. X